Top 10 Worst G1 Transformers Toys

What makes an action figure the worst?  Could be anything from playability, design, concept execution, or even personality. No matter what criteria is used you’re going to find out what makes our top 10 worst G1 Figures.

#10 Gears

A little irritation goes a long ways and irritation lands Gears at number 10.  Even the Autobots tried to change him (you know the good guys), only for him to go back to “who he was.” “Gears is anti-social, a self-proclaimed misfit. Finds fault in everything and everyone…”

When not complaining, or just generally not in good spirts for being on a planet he hates, he can be found helping his fellow Autobots see the good in all situations.  Looks reasonably good, in both robot and vehicle modes.

#9 Huffer

“Huffer is cynical, hard-boiled, and pessimistic. He looks at the world through sludge-colored wind-shields. Will complain it can’t be built, then builds it anyway. Not too sociable, but absolutely reliable…”

I will always remember the time a customer messaged me and said “he’s got no shoulders”.  When all I could think “He has shoulders, but rather has no arms or hands!”  Good times and a good laugh.  Huffer is on here as he is one miserable looking robot.  And that’s all that needs to be said.

#8 Sky Lynx

A toy that had so much potential.  Love the alt-mode, but what can I say, there is really no robot mode here.  All Robots should have hands!

“A powerful fighter. Self-centered and boastful. Fearless, daring, believes himself to be superior to many of his fellow Autobots. Shell-resistant and steel-reinforced hull can withstand enemy bombardment and extreme temperature variations…”

Yes, a fearless fighter..…. with no hands. Again a robot fighter with no hands.  Could have given this guy so much more so easily.  How hard would it have been to give him proper arms and legs with all that room on the shuttle frame? They could have given this guy hands, arms, the whole bit.  I guess the whole lack of hands thing was penance for his personality.

#7 Warpath

At this point I realize I’m picking on the Autobots!  It’s not going to change!  “Thinks he is more impressive than his comrades do…likes to show off his sharpshooting. Boisterous, loud-mouthed…raucous sense of humor makes him welcome company. Vain—-upset by even the smallest scratch in his gun barrel…”

This character is right out of the vintage Batman TV show “WHAMMO” “BANG” “KABOOM”.  He likes it loud.  He’s not gentle, but that gun pointing out of his chest is a little frightening to all those around him.

Now with all the tech spec info coming at you, you’d think he’s not bad.  Warpath is a soldier right on!  But wait, I don’t think of cowards as soldiers! His worst characteristic is the whining, even the other Autobots loathe him.  Ratchet, the medic even hazed him.  I get that he’s homesick, but enough already!

#6 Galvatron

In the movie he was voiced by Leonard Nimoy, one of my favorite actors.  So great, Megatron wanted more power after his near death experience.  Unicron said, no problem here you go. But to me just looking at this, everything just went backwards.  On paper it looks great, a mega villain who’s invincible! “Galvatron is a cold-hearted robotic villain. Determined to lead the Decepticons. Possesses enough strength to pulverize an Autobot into scrap metal. Unconquerable. Arrogant and compassionless…”

Aside from the fact he seemed to not really lead.  Additionally, while Megatron had some rage and lost some focus, at least Megatron wasn’t out of his dang mind.  Forgetting the character for a moment (as well as his personality issues), the real issue is the toy.  If Hasbro had asked themselves what a death ray sounds like pointed at your head, it isn’t any of the current sounds Galvatron emits.  For me he’s big, bulky, blockish and not terribly good looking.

#5 Rodimus Prime

“A vanguard for the Autobot ranks. Possesses acute military prowess. Speaks with the savvy of a seasoned veteran. Expert tactician with exceptional maneuverability in battle. Can be hot-headed at times. Has a tendency to act first and ask questions later…”

Regular robot, gets the big ticket up, reformatted into a prime.  He’s the man (err robot) living the dream.  Some of his command decisions just weren’t the best conceived.  The real issue isn’t the quality of his character, or the plot of the movie or show……it’s the toy.  Dang, I personally don’t think the vehicle is all that bad (though it’s a bit blocky), but as decent as that is, robot mode is no laughing matter.  I like my robot’s arms to do a bit more than point at their feet or salute heil Hitler.  If you lay him down I swear he’s planking!  You be the judge!­­­­­

#4 Sparkstalker

I could pick any of the Firecons….. So I choose the pink one.  The tech reads like he’s got some skills, “His greatest talents are revealed in the tiniest structures. An expert in robbing memory banks, counterfeiting printed circuits, decoding binary messages. Meticulous, cautious, obsessed with minute details…”

A gimmick toy, which was all gimmick and no toy!  Terrible just doesn’t describe it for me.  Terrible just starts to scratch the surface. I could have stuck a block of wood in a lathe and come out with about the same thing; a square with pointless arms and legs screwed on! Anyone care to comment about what you thought about this when you got it 30 years ago?

#3 Ironhide

“’Go chew on a microchip!’ is Ironhide’s slogan. Prefers action to words. Oldest, toughest, most battle-tested Autobot. Bodyguard to Optimus Prime. In charge of guarding anything of importance. Gruff, but kind…”

This figure is here for one reason and one reason only.  I could pick either Ratchet or Ironhide, but I’ll keep Ratchet.  At least Ratchet’s an ambulance, but without a brain, mouth or a face how’s he going to help? Yes, here we have the headless Transformer!

Let’s be honest, in 1984, when we all looked at the toy shelves poor Ironhide was up against exotic sports cars, guns, Walkman’s and fighter jets.  Ironhide and Ratchet didn’t stand much of a chance.  When they got their shot and the kids bought one, their reward – a headless faceless toy.  As a child I never got one. I have often wondered what I would have thought about that a faceless Ironhide. Anyone care to comment on what you thought as a child? Maybe you were all more forgiving than me.

I get where the toys came from.  I get the show modified them for us a bit, but still kids didn’t know.  It’s still objectionable in robot mode.  The vehicle form is pretty nicely done at least.  (Editor’s note Ironhide’s Trithyllium-steel skin was penetrated in an attack just prior to the photo shot)

#2 Topspin

The choice here is an easy one.  It could have been Topspin or Twintwist really.  The box sounded promising!

“… Uses 2 rear jet engines to go 300mph… goes 80mph on water with 2 front pontoons… has 2 hi-voltage electric cannons and 2 hand lasers built in… carries a powerful twin ion impulse blaster.”

Now that sounded great!  But where was the execution?  It comes down to the fact the dang toy hardly worked when it came out 30 years ago.  I understand price point marketing strategy and all, but aside from the toys primary gimmick (which hardly worked when new), he didn’t really transform either.  The whole gimmick went against what Transformers were.  Transformers….TRANSFORM! Was the toy meant to look like a free happy meal toy?  Man, it sure has that feel!

#1 Wheelie

Well we took a poll about this a while back.   The majority voted Wheelie.  It was hands down, almost everyone’s least favorite.

“Wheelie is the sole survivor from a party of intergalactic colonists who crash landed on Earth. He’s a barbaric little savage who managed to stay alive by cunning, stealth, and fearlessness. Speaks in odd rhyming sentences and despises the Decepticons…”

Who can forget Wheelie?  He was tiny, bright and obnoxious in every episode. That voice was something else!  He was always talking in rhymes and riddles.  He’s like the character you hope will just die.  For me that’s reason enough to make him number one.

There it is our top 10.  Who’s in yours that we missed?  Let us know!

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2 thoughts on “Top 10 Worst G1 Transformers Toys

  1. Along with Wheeljack, Ironhide was one of the first two Transformers I got, for Christmas of 1984. Yeah, I had a few Gobots at the time, but Transformers we’re bigger and way cooler, and to be honest I while I did notice the lack of a head, there WAS the face sticker lol. But anyways, I never really paid that much attention until I was older.

  2. Even though the toys themselves were and are crap, Ironhide and Ratchet were two of my favorite characters. Sure, it was damn hard to imagine them as their G1 selves, but every battle, Ironhide was front and center! Ratchet was always in the back, patching up the injured bots!

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